Hot from the press!
Recently unclassified documents that have been classified since April this year have uncovered some very revealing information about an abduction that happened in the same month. Reports state that one of our fellow humans has been abducted by a spaceship. Not aliens, mind you. A spaceship. The documents heavily insisted on that fact, for some reason.
To this journalist, spaceship equals aliens, but I guess that's just me.
According to some of the first reports the documents talk about, there wasn't any screaming, there wasn't any disturbances, it just... Happened. A scary thought. To just be picked up without a moments notice.
Good thing there's always some peeping Toms about to tell the story after the fact:
"We were on our morning walk... Or was it evening walk? I don't really remember. Either way, we saw this guy.. or girl? near some apple trees and there was this weird drone following him... Or her. And one time that person was there and the other they were just gone. It all happened so fast."
And there we have it folks. One time you're there, the other you just vanish... Into a spaceship!
And I guess the next thing that person will be doing is exploring planets on behalf of their new overlords. I can already imagine: digging, gathering ores, cutting down trees. If they even have trees out in space. Who knows?!
Well: I guess the (un)classified documents do, because they don't stop there, at the confused human's interview. How hard can it be to tell if someone is a man or woman, am I right? Either way, the documents detail some very interesting things.
Our very own space agency's long range telescopes were able to spot the spaceship at one point or another, and they saw something very peculiar. Whatever planet the spaceship landed on, our unknown hero jumped out and started doing exactly what I imagined: (editors note: our journalist obviously already read the documents as he was writing this piece, so it shouldn't come as a shock what's about to be said here...) digging, cutting trees, gathering ores, but it didn't stop there. Our hero supposedly started making a whole infrastructure, with the click of a button they apparently were able to put down foundations, floors, all kinds of tools, a whole factory, if you will.
The things you're able to do when you're all on your own...
In other news
I had a little birdy tell me about some updates hanging on the horizon, something about more recipes, more things to make, more content... I don't really know what it all means, I'm just a journalist journalistining whatever I hear, whether it's important, ground-breaking, heart-warming, or just plain boring. I don't really care, I just wanna get to as many ears as I possibly can.
Anyways, that's that for this news flash, stay tuned for the next one.
Stay plexum!