Are you someone who loves exploring space and cherishes freedom? Do you feel deeply troubled by the existence of space dictatorships and have no preference for the kind of government that will replace them, as long as its leader doesn't self-identify as an Overperson? If this describes you, then the revolution has an opportunity that might interest you!
The revolution's exciting project DIG - Deep In Galaxies is officially launching March 8th. We have several open positions waiting for you, whether you're a bomber with a knack for explosions, a ninja from outer space or a doctor who prefers machetes over scalpels.
As part of the rebellion, your functions will be:
- Working with a talented team of rebels who will do nothing to help you overthrow the tyrannical government. Imagine how much your resume will grow!
- Explore the galaxy and chart your own course with no supervision whatsoever. Work independently and take ownership of your projects!
- Bring a few friends in to assist you in your mission, with no boring selection processes needed! If you can fire, then you're hired.
Benefits of working for the rebellion:
- Choose how to face your challenges. Will you go full grenade-launcher or will you face your foes armed with a broken bottle? Your decision!
- Be the first to experiment combining skills no one has tested before! What will happen if you combine explosive ammunition with a perk to make all bullets ricochet? You will be the first to discover it.
- You will be provided with your very own grappling-hook. Specially useful to play the rebellion's version of "the floor is lava" (in which the floor is, quite literally, lava).
- Space challenges to spice up your adventure (low self-preservation instinct recommended).
- Every day at work is different: the assignation of space sectors has been randomized you won't ever start your journey in the same place as the last time!
- You get to work on your birthday! What gift would be better than dedicating your life to the liberation of the galaxy?
- Salary range: Undisclosed (but you get to keep the ores you mine!)
And best of all, no previous experience or qualifications are needed! At all!
Don't miss your chance to leave a mark in space history and take your career to new heights (or depths, if you dig deep enough). We have no doubt that you will thrive in any position and make a valuable contribution to the future of the galaxy.
Come aboard, and join the revolution!