Here's a thong: have you considered what Mr. X from the Resident Evil 2 remake looks like underneath that trenchcoat and hat?
Wonder no more! There's a mod for that.
The Beachboy X mod, available to download from NexusMods, replaces Mr. X's coat with "fancy swimwear, flip-flops and sunglasses". In short: it gives Mr. X an Umbrella-themed thong.