The Shareholders continue to improve your Software Product.
Battlefield objects such as Lunar Rifts and Vines are now selectable during the setup phase. This will help set you up for success.
Added an option to disable screen shake in the settings menu. Because we like to shake things up. Or not. It’s your choice now!
Adjusted newspapers to make font size slightly larger. As we continue to investigate ways to make newspapers even more readable, we will be offering free reading glasses to interested parties.*
Added an option to the first Shareholder conversation which allows players to keep things professional. The developers kindly request that their family members select this option.
Added subtitles to the intro sequence. Added secret code to the subtitles. The secret? There is no code.
Added a version number to the settings. Who says hotfixes can’t be thrilling?
*while supplies last.
Note: supplies are out.
Fixed a bug that was preventing Hat Rack’s final unbond conversation from playing, which means that Rayna can now truly emotionally move on from Hat Rack if players so desire. Now if only I could take a page from Rayna’s book and learn to move on. I’m sorry, Anna. I promise I’ll stop calling.
Fixed soft lock that would occur when using Pallas’s Freeze ability on enemies who had upcoming scripted events (Doublebeard, Leatherlegs, Patchouli, and Sylex). Note: Please only target enemies with the Freeze ability, not the game itself.
Fixed soft lock that could occur from presenting dialogue log right as a conversation was ending. Have not yet come to terms with the way “dialogue log” sounds in our heads.
Allies can now stabilize each other’s hangovers during The Hangover Heroes battle, making the third star achievable even when Rayna is at a high level of burnout. Players who requested permission to refer to the battle as The Hangover Stabilization Heroes may now do so.
Implemented a potential fix for a bug that would sometimes cause dialogue to skip to the next line. While the passage of time is absolutely relentless, it should not, in fact, jump forward.
Added missing burnout cost icon to battle replay button; before, burnout was triggering but players weren’t informed of this in advance. We apologize for this decrease in blissful ignorance.
Added missing field report maps to the battle replay menu. You may now consider the Elderhold cartographed (use this word to impress and/or irk your friends!).
Gated Joy and Sylvie’s 4th and 5th bond scenes behind the appropriate moments in the story (they were playing earlier than they were supposed to). Gating joy does not seem like a sound creative decision in a hotfix intended to increase player satisfaction, but here we are.
Fixed an issue causing portraits to be blurry on field reports. For heroes who engage in battle against gelatinous oozes, the difference may be subtle.
Fixed various visual bugs. The game is now .3% more aesthetically pleasing.
Fixed various minor UI bugs. The game is now .3% more interfacially pleasing.
Fixed more typos. And yet so many typos remain. Will we ever truly be free of them?
The Shareholders are aware of the following issues with your Software Product (and are at this very moment performing Economantic rituals to ensure the unwavering dedication of the employees responsible for fixing said issues):
Still no way to quit to the main menu. We kindly request that players start referring to their “desktop” as their “main menu” so that this issue will be resolved, if not on a technical level, then at least on a linguistic one.
If the game is closed during a cinematic or conversation, upon reload it will skip to the end of said cinematic or conversation. We kindly request that players never close the game. Ever.
Dialogue options are sometimes locked behind the incorrect relationship level. This is because the narrative team had to work with numbers, which they 1000% do not understand.
Sometimes battle replay scenes use regular portraits instead of replay figurines. To standardize this, all in-game portraits will now be an identical monochromatic rectangle in a postmodern shade of off-beige.
Some liabilities are labeled as active when they are, in fact, passive. The company does not recognize the concept of being “passive,” as it leaves Shareholder Value up to chance. Acceptable modes include: active, proactive, aggressive, passive aggressive, proactively aggressive, retroactively active, and feral.