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Prison authorities held a press conference today in reaction to calls for improved prison buildings after more than 3000 dangerous cons escaped confinement last week.
Reacting to the criticism, Prison Warden Chris D said to the press:
"Based on evidence taken from a variety of prisons over the past week, we've seen that cons are largely using a single method of escaping their jail time currently. With this information, we've constructed a new prison designed specifically to counter that method of escape."
Asked if he had a message for the escaped cons, Chris stated:
"They'll come back. They always do. It's a compulsion. But this time, they're going to have to be more innovative."
Meanwhile, in other news, mailing services worldwide have been forced to shutdown operations after an influx of large cakes destroyed mail sorting machines.
MT17