It took a couple of days, and a LOT of thinking, but I think I’ve got it figured out. I was taking the bus to work one day, had my headphones on, my breakfast bagel in one hand and my crossword in the other. It was a great morning. A great Tuesday morning. I think it was a Tuesday? It must have been a Tuesday, Tuesday is breakfast bagel day. They only do breakfast bagels on Tuesdays. Of COURSE it was a Tuesday.
Anyway, I’m buying this bagel as it was my birthday; and what better a day to treat yourself to a Tuesday breakfast bagel than a Tuesday breakfast BIRTHDAY bagel right????? So the bagel guy asks me what I’ve got going on today, and I tell him it’s my birthday. He goes “Oh, Happy Birthday!” and I said “You too!”.
Can you believe that?! "You too?" This is why I'm a banana. I’m being punished. I’m being punished for not being able to have simple interactions with other humans. I can repair and build a WHOLE depressurization chamber in 13 hours but I can’t SMALL TALK my bagel guy? This is my penance. How long does penance usually last? Like a couple of weeks right?